My Four Year-old Son is Paralyzed
It’s easy to understand why I quit drinking, but my son’s subsequent stroke and his recovery were beyond imagining.

This all happened about three years ago. It was my father’s birthday and all of our family had gathered at his house. Suddenly, my four year-old son became paralyzed on the right side of his body. Apparently he had a stroke. He looked just like my father, who also was paralyzed on one side and had been bedridden for the last ten years. I couldn’t believe this could happen to a four year-old child. In a matter of moments my healthy and good-looking son’s face went completely slack on his right side and he was unable to use that side of his body. We went straight from my father’s house to the seon center and met Hyejin Sunim, who was shocked to see what had happened to Jonas. She took Jonas, Kirstin, and I to the Dharma hall, where, all together, we did three bows from the very bottom of our hearts. You see, my wife and I both had a strong feeling that, somehow, this wasn’t something that a hospital could help with. We finished the three bows, and with a slurred voice, Jonas asked if we could just stay in the Dharma hall instead of going to the hospital. With tears in his eyes, Jonas said that if he could just stay in the Dharma hall, he felt that he would recover. It really broke my heart. But Hyejin Sunim persuaded Jonas, saying “I think you should go to the hospital and get checked out. Otherwise, when you recover, nobody will believe that your condition was real. Most people don’t have any faith in their fundamental mind, and truly know almost nothing about Buddhism.” With that, she went up to the Buddha altar and took the bowl of water that was there and gave it to Jonas. Jonas took that huge bowl and drank every drop of the water. And then we went to the hospital.

We took Jonas to an outstanding children’s hospitals in Germany. As you may know, German medicine is quite advanced, probably the best in the world, but even after dozens of scans and tests, and the best specialists in Germany, the doctors couldn’t explain what had happened to Jonas or even how he should be treated. So, three or four days later, we left the hospital and went to the Seon Center. It appeared that Jonas’ problem wasn’t one of the ordinary material realm. We heard from Kun Sunim and she told us to have a chondo for those spirits whose names were unknown, i.e. not a usual family chondo ceremony. Over the next two or three days, as we prepared for the chondo ceremony, Jonas’ paralysis almost completely disappeared; it was so amazing. It was like watching a time-lapse film of a flower blooming, as Jonas’ face returned to normal. By the time we finally had the chondo ceremony, Jonas could kneel, make the water offering, and do full bows without any hindrance. It was truly the most amazing experience, and we gained a tremendous insight into the power that is released when all minds and our mind truly become one.

These days, whenever anyone at the seon center holds a chondo ceremony, Kirstin and I always attend. It doesn’t matter whose chondo it is, it is also our chondo. We offer water and participate with our whole hearts, and through participating in those chondo ceremonies, little by little, our own practice has become much deeper.

Jonas, Buddha’s Errand Boy
Jonas is our only child, and has just started elementary school here in Germany.

Last July (2006) our family visited Korea for the fourth time. With every trip to Korea I can see Jonas change. He used to be very quiet, almost never speaking, and was especially uncomfortable when lots of people were around. But with each trip to Korea, he’s become more outgoing and relaxed. On this last trip, he was very outgoing, and enjoyed buying gifts and later giving them to his friends.

On our first trip to Korea we had a chance to greet Kun Sunim with Jonas. While greeting her, she said, “This child has come to this world for a special purpose.” Three times Kun Sunim asked, “Who are his parents?” At first Kirstin and I thought that was all there was to that question, but later we realized that Kun Sunim was talking the fundamental inner Buddha. It felt like she was telling us that we would need to understand this in order to properly raise Jonas. During this last trip, after we had greeted Kun Sunim, Jonas put his finger in the middle of his forehead and said, “When Kun Sunim looks at us, she doesn’t see us with her eyes, she sees us through here,” indicating the spot on his forehead. Have you ever heard a six-year old say such a thing? The next day it happened that we were again able to greet Kun Sunim, and so while there I told Hyejin Sunim what Jonas had said, and she translated it for Kun Sunim. Kun Sunim laughed and laughed, and then asked Jonas, “What am I using to see you now?” Jonas promptly put his finger to his forehead again, and Kun Sunim laughed some more. A child like Jonas really forces his parents to practice diligently!

Honoring My Father
This trip we visited Korea with Hyejin Sunim and met Kun Sunim, Anyang Juji Sunim, and visited the Kwangju and Jinju branches. While visiting and attending various Dharma talks, we met so many wonderful sunims and lay members. When we arrived in Korea, I felt like my head contained a cargo truck full of worries and concerns; but three weeks later when we left, all of those burdens had melted away and my mind felt peaceful and relaxed. During our trip, I had experience the sincere love and support of all my Dharma brothers and sisters in Korea. I could feel their arms around me and their unconditional support. It felt like my heart had been scrubbed clean. It felt as if the shadows, difficulties, and stubbornness in my heart had completely melted away, leaving me feeling light and happy. This is what I really noticed about our Korean Dharma brothers and sisters: they seem to have a gift for uplifting people’s spirit as soon as you meet them.

This past July, as we were on our way to the Frankfurt airport to fly to Korea, my phone rang. It was my older brother - my father had died last night. As I heard this, the thought arose that, “This isn’t a coincidence. My father passes away just as I’m leaving to spend three weeks in Korea exploring the truth that leads to freedom. This didn’t happen by chance.” It was absolutely clear to me that going to Korea would free my father’s spirit and open his path for him. The rest of my family could attend to his funeral in Germany, while I would go to Korea and help guide him to a completely different dimension. I felt like I was really able to serve him. My mother and my brother both said, “Go to Korea and see Kun Sunim, and do what should be done.” This was why they hadn’t told me the night before when father passed away, and only told me now as I was about to leave. My wife’s mother, too, passed away just three weeks before we were to leave for Korea, and so the 49th day ceremony was held in Korea. None of this was a coincidence.

For the Sake of Our Ancestors
We had already prepared offerings on behalf of Kirstin’s mother, and together with the expenses for traveling to Korea, and so when my father suddenly died, there was no money left to prepare an offering for him. Hyejin Sunim told us that, “Nevertheless, just entrust all of those problems to your foundation.” Thus, we tried to do this, and went to Korea. We met Kun Sunim and told her about everything that had happened, and gave her the offering we had prepared for Kirstin’s mother. Kun Sunim put her palms together, and told us to make frequent offering to Buddha as our financial circumstances improved. Doing this, she said, would greatly befit us and our even our extended families. I completely believed her, I understood immediately why she said this. Before I met her, I had felt so completely blocked, that no matter what I did there was no way out, there was no hope. It was after I met Kun Sunim and started putting her teachings into practice that I felt like so much garbage in my life had been swept away, freeing me to move forward. As I listened to Kun Sunim, it occurred to me that, having been born into the Thuemmel family, I wanted to do something to repay that kindness, and felt that my role in that family was to help lead everyone forward to a spiritually better place. The instant I had that thought, I had the strangest feeling; it seemed like all of my ancestors and my whole family had just spiritually been lifted to a higher dimension.

We had a second chondo ceremony for my father’s ancestors, my mother’s ancestors, and my wife’s ancestors, and each time we did that, I felt a little bit lighter, as if something had melted away. And I felt the same way about my father. Although he had passed away in Germany and I was in Korea, I could feel him benefiting from the Dharma teachings of the ceremony. I felt his fear disappear and he became very peaceful. If it hadn’t been for the chondo ceremony, I wouldn’t have been able to help him at all.

Germany is a country based upon Christian culture. So when someone dies, a lot of money is spent on a big funeral with a nice coffin and lots of flowers. They are buried in a cemetery with a farewell from their family. And that is the end of it. Once they’re buried, there is nothing more that can be done for them. This, to me, is the real limitation of Christianity. And I think this is why funerals always felt so bleak and overcast to me. The feeling is quite different at places where the people understand about their fundamental mind. Because everything is connected to me in a fundamental and non-dual way, when I entrust my hopes and wishes for someone’s wellbeing to my foundation, that energy can reach the other person and help free them from their darkness and the chains of their karmic consciousness.

Gratitude towards My Teacher

During this trip to Korea, it became even clearer to me that, to the extent I can empty myself and let go of “I” and fixed thoughts, my path will open before my eyes. My path becomes clearer with each day that I can live without fretting and worrying about the things that arise in my life. Each day in Korea I experienced how this practice fulfills and guides and purifies me. Honestly, during the three weeks we were in Korea, I felt as if I was continuously being purified. As we visited the different Seon Center branches, it felt like I was leaving everything behind. However, if there was one thing I could take with me, it would be the ability to deeply accept things as they are. I would like the ability to accept everything, regardless of good or bad, and completely entrust it all. Through Daehaeng Kun Sunim, I was able to learn about my fundamental true self, and as I do this, I feel like I am becoming complete. Now I want to do my best to live in accord with that true self.

My eyes fill with tears when I think about how I, who had so many faults and failings, was able to do something to truly help my family and our parents. What I’m trying to say isn’t particularly about the chondo ceremony. Everything in my life arouse from this profound connection we share with all life and all creation, so instead of worrying about things and judging them by worldly standards, I would like to tell everyone to just flow with the things that arise and go forward while entrusting it all to this foundation we all share. I would like to express my deepest gratitude to Kun Sunim, along with all of our other sunims and Dharma brothers and sisters for all of their help in guiding us and teaching us about this profound world of mind. Thank you so much.